country to the core

So I finally struck up the courage and I did it. I went back to my small town for a good friend's wedding. I am not sure what kept me, but I am glad I went back. I stopped along the way to take a picture of the sunset. God and I have a thing with sunsets. From the moment I headed down my old dirt road, I felt right. Everything was just how I remembered it, only better. The sun had just set, and everywhere there was the twinkling of hundreds of fireflies. My heart was just happy. Just as I was thinking of pulling over to talk to Brooklyn about the bugs, she squeals, "Mama, look at all the fireflies!!!!" We stopped and just watched the twinkling. The girl and I are kindred spirits. The older she gets, the more amazed I am at that truth.

We woke up the next morning to go fishin. I LOVE FISHING! I hadn't been in so long. Here is my niece and Brooklyn in the back of the truck...watching out for branches. We were on our way to the hole...
That's my girl. A girl and her pole. She is so much like me, its unbelievable.
Below, on the left is the all time best fisherman in the world. He has also caught the biggest Flathead to be found in the Midwest, shortly after he almost shot a 16 point buck, but before he caught the biggest bass in Kansas...oh, he'll tell you so. That's my brother, who now owns the land that I grew up on. We clash, in a huge way. But he's a whole lot of fun to fish with.

Next to my brother, is country boy Gabe. He's a whole lot of fun to fish with too. He helped Brooklyn hold her first fish. A gentle mannered, home grown, Kansas country boy...you can't help but love him. I am supposed to join him and a group of friends, for a Merle Haggard concert...I am very much looking forward to it! Its really nice how God just brings friends out of the woodwork, when He knows you really need them.

Before the day was over, all of us were soaked head to toe. Kansas summers are hot, so our fishin trip turned into a jump in the creek, lets swim kind of trip. I felt like a kid again. Brooklyn was walking through the water barefoot. I kept trying to get her to put her shoes on, she insisted that she go without...I'm telling ya, the girl is country to the core. We splashed each other, dunked each other, and caught creatures with our bare hands. Gabe even got Brooklyn to touch a crawdad! We had country music blaring from the truck. It was so much fun! Sometimes, when life feels crazy, the best thing a woman can do for herself is get back to her roots. On this day, in these moments, I was authentic. I was me. And the best part was seeing Brooklyn's roots grow.

I laid down with Brooklyn that night to snuggle while she fell asleep. She was exhausted. Before she nodded off...

Brooklyn: Mom, I gotta ask you sumpin.

Me: What do ya need to ask me?

Brooklyn: Well, I was thinkin...(pause, as she is really thinkin)

Me: Yeah...

Brooklyn: I was thinkin maybe we could get a river like Uncle Brett's.

Me: Me too! Did you have fun today?

Brooklyn: Yeah Mama. I like fishin.

We have been home since yesterday, and already she is asking to go back. While we were there we washed her horse, and she rode a little. She fed the chickens and helped my niece with her chores. She swam in the creek and caught frogs and touched fish and went on adventures. She was as happy as I have ever seen her, and I wish that I could give her that kind of life every single day. That is how I grew up. That is how I want her to grow up. (More on these plans in a future post.) Home sick for the country, we went on a country drive today. We used to do this a lot when she was teeny tiny and it was just the two of us. I would head out on the highway. I would pick any dirt road and just turn and drive. I would look at the beautiful country homes, the big old barns, the porches and the trees and the horses grazing, and just dream of a day when I would have that. I would put her in the front seat, turn on the country, and we would just look longingly at the homes we could only dream of. She would squeal with excitement any time she spotted a horse, and talk and talk about having a horsey. I promised her that one day, we would have a home in the country, and she would have her very own horse. I meant it. Today, I just picked a little town not too far, one I had never been to. We turned on the country and drove. Only this time, we had Charlotte in the back seat. It was perfect. It wasn't only me and my little girls, it was me and my best friend. We were silly and singing loudly. We stared out the windows longing for the same things...

Brooklyn: I sure do like all these trees.

Me: I love them.

Brooklyn: I sure do wish we could have a corn field.

Me: (laughing) Me too, babe.

Brooklyn: It sure would be neat if we just had some corn.

The girl was serious. She wants a corn field. The minute we move to the country, we are planting this girl a row of corn. Well, right after we find her a horse.

Another one of her "country to the core" moments:

We were walking with my niece Kyri. Brooklyn sorda slipped on some loose gravel.(this is another way she is just like me, so graceful :o) She hopped right up.

Kyri: Are you okay?

Brooklyn: Yeah, I'm okay. (dusting her hands off)

Me: (smiling) Are you sure? You kinda fell hard there...

Brooklyn: Yeah mom, that's just what cowgirls do.

Kyri and I start laughing.

Brooklyn: And that's how cowgirls just get right up, huh mama?

Me: That's right, Brookie.

My cup runneth over.